Saturday, August 21, 2010

Hello and goodbye

I thought I would give you a little update (if anyone is still reading this, that is) on where things are.

First off, I'm good. I'm really good. Actually better than I've been in a long time.

I've been working with my doctor to get to where I am now and in a nutshell, I was diagnosed with an OCD in regards to food and eating. After many talks, lots of thinking, I've come to realize that it makes sense. I am obsessed with food.

One of the treatments for this is to not put it on the forefront of my mind every day. I KNOW that journalling what I eat is good. I KNOW that having a blog talking about what I'm eating, how I'm trying to be healthy and exercise updates is good. BUT neither of these are helping me to stop obsessing about food.

So he's advised me, for a while, to stop writing, talking, thinking about it all. And it's been helping. I haven't missed blogging. I haven't missed the anxiety (for lack of a better word) of weighing in, admitting my mistakes, telling you all if I have gained or lost, been a good girl or a bad girl, I'm just going about my days and my obsession with food is definitely taking a backseat.

There are a lot of variables as to why this is - one being I'm back at work. Which has always helped because I always pack my lunch and never really buy food. I'm eating well, really well. But I'm allowing myself a treat here and there and I don't beat myself up over it. Eating one bad thing doesn't set me off and stop only when everything I'm craving has been eaten.

And can I tell you something? It's such a relief! To be making room in my head for more important things then my neuroses about food? I feel so great.

Anyways, I hope one day to be back to blogging. I am still reading all your blogs when I get a chance. I don't think I will come back here, I hope one day I will find what it is I really want to write about and if and when I do? I will come find you all and show you where I am.

Until then - be happy, be healthy and be good to yourself.


6 people had this to say:

rusty61 said...

Good luck to you Christy. I've been wondering how you were doing. A lot of the things that we do to help us lose weight do tend to put food at the forefront of everything, and it's hard not to be constantly thinking, oh, I better write that down, what did I eat, what will I have later, when will I eat, etc.

I'm glad to hear that you're managing things better for you, and I wish you health and happiness. Take care.

Gina Fit by 41 Maybe 42 said...

I'm so happy you are in a good place and finding direction. Awesome.

I noticed for me, the blogging purpose has morphed. It started out for me to just be more conscious about what I'm doing (helpful or harmful). Others actually began reading my blog and said they related to me -- that was great to have common ground and support. I began writing for them, too. It was fun. But two others who thought they were supportive would say things that just tore me up inside. It's hard to write with a judgmental audience.

Happy days are ahead for you. I wish continued health for your family.


Malinda said...

i feel like I'm doing the same thing in relation to baby making! lol And it feels damn good!

so happy to hear you're just rocking life!

hugs to you Christy!


JavaChick said...

I'm very glad to hear that things are going well for you. Honestly, the not obsessing make so much sense to me. Best of luck to you and hope to hear from you again some day!

Sara said...

"Until then - be happy, be healthy and be good to yourself"

You too...

I hope things work out well for you and thanks for sharing your story -- I've enjoyed reading your blog.

Take care -- Sara

Teresa said...

Wishing you well. Take care.