Monday, December 10, 2012

Ramblings (nothing you haven't heard before). More for me than you.

As I look outside the window, it looks dark, rainy, freezy-rainy and just one of those idratherstayathomeunderthecovers type of day.  But alas, I have a full time out of the home job, so here I am.  Here I am wishing the pho place delivered.  Instead, I'm eating my chicken and vegetables and drinking hot tea. 

And thinking.  Always thinking.

My last post was a result of some weight-frusteration.  I had been having a conversation about weight loss with a colleague and she was saying how she knows why she isn't losing weight, it's because she's been doing sfa in terms of diet and exercise.  Her and I are quite close, and talk daily, so she knows I go to the gym 5 days a week and she sees what I eat at work and when I tell her I'm not losing anything she is shocked and says she doesn't understand. 

Am I shocked?  No, not really.  Yes, 80% of the time I'm good.  My breakfast/lunch and dinner are right on par with someone trying to lose weight.  I work out 5 days a week (2 * spinning, 2 * bootcamp, 1 * yoga).  But it's the additional eating that's stalling my weight loss. 

When I lost a whole crap load of weight right before I hit 30, it was because I was running.  I ran almost 10K a day, but did not really alter my eating.  I remember my roommate and I at the time ordering out most nights, and let's just say I never ordered a salad.  But I lost about 40 lbs in less than 6 months. 

Now that I'm in my *cough* late 30's, it doesn't happen that easily.  I spend plenty of hours in the gym, lots of time cutting up my vegetables, making my lunch, grocery shopping to make sure we never have to order out because there's nothing in the house..

So what's the problem you ask?  It's the other 20% of the time.  It's when we make chocolate chip cookies for my son's birthday and I eat a handful of chocolate chips.  And then 4 cookies.  It's when it's Halloween and I have 3-4 mini chocolate bars a night until they are gone.  It's opening the freezer to take out ice cream from when we had the cousins over the night before and eating it right from the container (with a spoon of course :)).  That 20% is what's dictating my weight loss (or more appropriately worded, lack there of).

Those bad habits are what I have to work on if I want to achieve the results I want.  I was so close to saying to myself "I will start in the new year".  But here I am, starting BEFORE the new year.  Not with unrealistic expectations.  We have about 8 Xmas parties to go to, I know I'll have a piece of shortbread (my fave).  I know there will be lots of wine to drink (my favourite bottle was $2 off, so I bought 6) but I have a few things I keep reciting to myself (Christmas will come again next year, the second (and third, and fourth) cookie tastes the same as the first, I want my health back more than I want that extra piece of cheese) to make sure I get through the holidays without gaining.

On a happier note, I have been surrounding myself with like-minded people and taking myself out of my comfort zone.  I went to a new gym with my neighbour (who I had never worked out with before, who's this totally fit wonder woman!) to try a spartan bootcamp class.  I'm sure I've said it before, but I'm pretty shy, so going anywhere (let alone the gym) with someone new is HUGE for me.  Then, I tried crossfit for the first time with a friend I hadn't seen since we did bootcamp together years ago, who's just as gorgeus and wonderful as she's always been (thanks for being my partner Amy!).  And very proud to say we kept up with the class, not coming in first, but not coming in last.  Perfectly fit in the middle, and considering it was our first time, I'm very proud.

So yes, this is where I stand, continuing to make more good habits than bad ones.  Onwards and upwards!




6 people had this to say:

Chantal said...

You've got the right attitude Christy, you do. And you are beautiful, really beautiful. And so damn STRONG, seriously I have worked out with you. You are a power house. LOVE YOURSELF woman, you deserve it. The rest will fall into place. Hugs! (in person ones soon :) ).

Christy said...

Chantal - you made me cry with your comment. Thank you, thank you, it means a lot :)

I'm slowly realizing that I need to learn to love myself before I'm going to accomplish everything else that I want.

Thanks you again :)

Mis(s)Mannered Mom said...

hey Christy, I also think we are our own worst critics and our own worst cheerleaders. Have you firstly had a thorough physical? I find that's a good start to get everything ruled out if things aren't going the way I'm expecting, body wise. Next, are you eating ENOUGH? I wasn't losing, and I was working out HARD. I was superdedooper frustrated, and then someone recommended eating MORE calories and voila-the weight started to come off again. Lastly, you are doing really, really fantastic. One cookie or glass of wine isn't going to derail you-and it's part of a complete healthy lifestyle. You are coming out of your comfort zone and trying new things and just LEAPING. It's all good stuff. :)

Amy Muldoon said...

We totally rocked it... :)

Can't wait for Saturday!

Christy said...

T - you know, maybe I should go get a physical. I have tried everything between 1200 cals to 2000 cals, and nothing seems to work. Except I think I get frustrated too easily, give up and then start over again with something new. I don't stick with anything long enough to see if it would actually give results. Thank you for your vote of confidence - you are a workout rockstar, so I am taking your words seriously :)

A - woo hoo, Saturday!

Teresa said...

I wish you all the best. Your story sounds very familiar. Keep strong.