Over already?

How is it already Sunday night? What happened to the weekend?

The plan was to stay in last night. After we cancelled dinner plans, we were going to take it easy... watch a movie, go to sleep early. What actually happened was, I got a call and in less then 45 minutes I was dressed and ready to go out. One of my close friends, Lisa, was turning 30. Lisa and I are quite close, we used to work together and now she lives down the street. But that's where the similarities end. She goes out (to bars, clubs, whatever you call them) and gets all fancied up (she's beautiful) with her Coach bags and her Tiffany jewellery. All her friends do. Normally I would feel kind of awkward, because, I know what stuff doesn't matter but I always feel like I'm the "one of these girls do not belong here, one of these girls is not the same" (sound familiar? I'm singing it to the tune of the Sesame Street song...?) Anyways, a friend of hers (whom I've befriended since she moved to the neighbourhood and she has two kids, the youngest just 6 months) called and offered to drive (which is great, we live about 20-25 minutes from downtown). I wasn't going to go. I really wasn't. But I decided to get off my lazy ass and go out. I put on my new jeans, a nice black top, my black fancy boots, some make up (I bought the fluidliner from MAC yesterday, good thing I did, it makes a world of difference).

Don't mind the mess in the background, just look at me :)

And I'm so glad I did. There was about 20 girls, and we had a great time. I think we strolled in around 2am. Now, I haven't seen two am (since maybe a midnight nursing probably 10 months ago). And I felt great. I was talking to people whereas before I would wait for them to come talk to me (I'm shy around new people), I had my new confidence that I've talked about over the past couple weeks. I sat with the girl who I drove with most of the night, both being mom's, we felt like we had beacon lights over our head blinking saying "mom alert, mom alert", everyone looked so young. It felt weird to be in a bar. But we had a few drinks, drank a few shots, they played wicked music from the early 90's (which I joked about - they saw us come in and wanted to make us feel welcome so they played the music that was the top ten the last time we were in a bar!) I got a million (ok, honestly at least 10 ) compliments on how I looked and everyone loved my hair (these girls aren't the type to compliment for niceties, they meant it) and I honestly believed them, and thought - yeah, I do look good. I think I've finally come into my own, I have grown into my looks. I didn't feel fat and ugly, which is surprising because they are all gorgeus and probably a size 2, and I'm not trying to say I'm gorgeus and all that, but I think I finally look the way I'm supposed to. My head fits my body, my body fits my face, my hair fits it all. Does that make sense? Ohh I don't know. I felt good and that's all that matters.

Anyways, today I am feeling totally overwhelmed. I just can't find the time to do everything I want to get done in a weekend. When Carson is up, I hate to do anything but just play with him. So during his two hour nap, I cooked (made a shepard's pie for him), cleaned up, did laundry, re-organized the storage room in the basement and ate lunch. After he went to bed tonight, I did tonight's dishes, put away three boxes of toys (that he wasn't playing with, I rotate his toys), put together two bags of clothes to bring to consignment, cleaned the fridge, folded laundry, and now am finally drinking tea and about to get ready for bed. I just feel stressed, I want to get so much done and just find I don't have the time. Oh well, I guess nothing NEEDS to be done right away. It will all get done... eventually.

Happy Monday everyone, have a great week!